What I Feel

When I see a real New Orleanian, meaning more real than me, I think it's very real!

Me, I think of Florida and New Orleans as the only regions I lived in.  I didn't experience completely traditional nor much old-fashioned at all Florida heritage, like rich people and people of the land.  It "was just a place to live in."

Sad

Guess we end our life here.

We have fun together.. I feel sorry for him.  He does get out somehow.

Don't Hate Him Totally

Why are you people nasty?

I'm worried..

..I felt at least that my dad was staring down someone once who was possibly even older than his mom.

Being an Actor - a Sacrifice for Money

It's not always the wisest decision to pack your bags and go to Hollywood|Broadway.

Problem

You have no right to get mad at someone like me and do something @ it.  It may be something that happened to me, it may be something that slipped my mind.  I have a hard life of people bothering me.  It just doesn't make sense to never say anything to me and to get mad like you knew me all along.

Apology

Sorry if you did not like that I titled a topic impolite.  Now, I am finding it "depressing.."

Apparently it was just a mistake.

Kids born @ 1985-1990 are not supposed to look overly Jewish-European.

Apology

I understand maybe I said things people didn't like, sorry, specific things..

Forever 21?

I found that people exactly @ 10 years younger even at my age 27 will still be having knock-about-fun and have the comeadery or parents's love from their parents.

My life is not content as ^2nd best^, yet I've been used.  You can argue people who are not mixed deserve more, and they do in ways, but I will stick up for other mixed people.  I know some are weird like in a nasty way, but they may some really be good or have good intentions.

Impolite

Renee Fleming stopped posting when I was upset @ something..  I was upset on the inside.  I posted on Twitter @ it.  I just forgot to watch her and it was like a big deal.  Shoulda been online, I felt, and I forgot sorta.

Problem

You all need to just stop punishing me.  I feel threatened by my stupidly strict secret message-y dad.  THREATENED.  What could he do?  My nail is already cutting in.  I need to leave and am trying to get famous, too, but it's money, and I wanna enjoy life.

Happy Thoughts

Sleep time.  :(  May have to get up and shower.  Maybe not.  I went for a jog/walk.

I was also

concerned @ my friends.

The Reason

I was dangerously bored, didn't think of getting a blog.  I was in that much pain, and you don't care that's why I went insane and did it.  What if you were trapped in a box like I felt, a big box.

Weird

Why didn't they say why they stopped answering all of a sudden?  Nothing too weird could have happened.  I liked forwarding my thoughts, and 1 friend said she liked it.  I am annoyed by secret messages that don't come to me as comments on my blog.

Why I Can Say This

Because it's my life, but also I forget there's another reason.  How insulting is it of them to not answer and say they are busy?

I Refuse

You can't all psych me out for something I kinda don't regret in a certain way.. who knows why.  You think I should be more inhibited as a person here, but that's not a big deal in that way.  I just sent like newsletters out.  Sometimes, people send 1 on Christmas.  I already apologized a lot.  I find it disgustingly rude no one answered, though.  Obviously, I wanted to talk.  Instead, you all talk about this.

Problem

There's nothing to talk about my friends for who didn't answer my e-mails.  I'm the 1 wasting time talking, too.

Today

I swam 1/2 - 1 hour.  I took a break for maybe 10 minutes and went to the bathroom once.

What It Feels Like

I'm getting the feeling I'm being treated like I'm a perverted kid or teen.

Also, if I get upset and accidentally knock something over, people get mad at me.

I just don't really take this sudden being treated like a bad, emotionally perverted kid!  I don't like being told I'm being talked to.

See, she is being mean to me for nothing!

The point is..?

Ellen likes to make me feel uncomfortable.  It's like having a .. oh I dunno.  I don't like when she says she means it in a bad way.  She just is there to be suggestive, but let's find out what she's really made of and moreso what she's doing.  You know, she made a joke @ not having a point as a broken pencil.  I do not sit around thinking @ 1 other person.  She is acting bossy.  It's making me uncomfortable.  People are all making fun of me.

Should I forget this?  I hardly have time to sing.  I think that medicine is making me sleep too much longer without really sleeping a whole night.

I dunno, I'm just sitting here looking at this.  She doesn't like Twitter, anymore.

Reruns

Ellen - Spring Break..